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  “Wouldn’t getting involved with me when I was working for them too have been a conflict of interest or something?”

  He lifted one big shoulder. “Possibly. But I’m pretty sure we could have worked it out.”

  “Huh.”

  “Then you up and left, moved to New York. That was a bit of a shock, honestly.”

  “Was it?”

  “Yeah. Though you still came back now and then. Plus there’d be shows on the East Coast and you’d usually turn up,” he said. “Thing was, when you were around, you were still angry. All pissed off about David and Ev getting together and being all happy and in love. So obviously, it still wasn’t the right time. But that’s okay. When it came to you, I was used to being patient.”

  I drank my champagne. David had pretty much written a whole album dedicated to how much I sucked. While we’d both had our faults, I couldn’t exactly say he was wrong. So the less my ex got mentioned the better.

  Sam smiled. “Now, however, things feel different.”

  “In what way?”

  “Well, these days when you see Dave, you mostly just seem awkward and a bit embarrassed about the whole thing.”

  My spine snapped straight. “No, I don’t.”

  “No? Okay. So I’m wrong.”

  “You don’t really believe that. You’re just trying to pacify me.”

  “Here’s what I believe…” He took another drink from my glass. “Martha, dearest, I’m not going to argue with you about shit that doesn’t matter.”

  I just blinked.

  “If you say you’re not worried about being around Dave, then great. I’m delighted to hear it,” he said. “All I care about is that you’re obviously no longer hung up on the guy.”

  “Of course I’m not.”

  “And then there’s the other thing.”

  “What other thing?”

  “The part where you haven’t screeched at me to let you go or even attempted to climb off my lap since I put you there a good…oh, I’d say four or five minutes ago now.”

  I froze.

  “Rather important, don’t you think?”

  “I did think about it.”

  “Screeching or escaping?” he asked calmly.

  “Escaping.”

  “But you didn’t.” He pressed a soft damp kiss to my forehead. “Very brave of you, Martha.”

  “Why do I always feel like a child throwing a tantrum around you?”

  “I definitely don’t think of you as a child.”

  “Yes, I’m aware of that. Your huge hard-on is sticking into my hip.”

  “Like I said, I’ve been waiting a long time. Just ignore it. God knows, I’m trying to,” he said. “As for the other, you do enjoy a good tantrum from time to time. But I rather enjoy your sharp edges. Keeps me on my toes.”

  I finished the champagne and held the glass out for a refill.

  “You have tomorrow off, don’t you?” he asked, pouring the bottle with precision. “Because you’re going to have a headache in the morning if you keep drinking.”

  I chugged the champagne like a lady. “Fill it again.”

  “I am your servant in all things.”

  “Bullshit.”

  “You’d be bored out of your beautiful brains in under two minutes if I was the sort of man you could walk all over.” He chuckled. “Maybe less wriggling around on my dick unless you’d like to up the timeline for things happening between us. I’m amenable. It’s up to you really. Just a polite warning.”

  I froze. “Hold up. The timeline?”

  “Hmm?”

  “Did you actually just say there was a timeline?”

  “What?” he asked, seemingly perplexed.

  “Fucking oversized ex-Navy SEAL alpha jerk control freak,” I grumbled. “You have, haven’t you? You’ve actually planned out to the day exactly how you think things are going to go down between us?”

  At this, the man seemed to hesitate for once. Wise of him really. “I wouldn’t dare assume when it came to you, my love.”

  “Oh, you liar. Let me guess, first a date. Somewhere nice, an intimate evening at a good restaurant.” I tapped a fingernail against my lips. “A few romantic moves, some hand-holding and deep and meaningful looks over dinner maybe. Then bang! Sex.”

  “Ah, well…”

  “I mean, you might have ideally wanted to wait until date two or three before taking things into the bedroom. But you have been waiting almost a decade as the boner sticking into my side keeps reminding me. So yes, we’ll fuck after the first date.” I saluted him with my glass of champagne before downing some more. My throat was so dry and my adrenaline levels high. It couldn’t be more necessary. “Around about that time, you’ll have a word with the guys to make sure they’re all aware that you and I are together and everyone’s fine with it. Because you’re all such a well-honed pack of male idiots who’ve been running together for so long.”

  He just looked at me. The man had an excellent poker face. But I could tell…

  “Yes, you’ll probably go out for a beer with my brother to start the whole advanced male bonding becoming a family one day thing. After that, you’ll want us to starting thinking about moving in together, getting our own place,” I said. Because that’s exactly what everyone else would do. And it might have been nice to be like everyone else, but I’d never quite fit no matter how hard I tried. Attempting normal would inevitably end in ruin. “Then, give it…oh say three months, we’ll go on vacation somewhere nice like Hawaii and you’ll pop the question. You’ve already saved up for the ring, haven’t you? Probably even got one picked out somewhere. Admit it, you do, don’t you?”

  His lips stayed firmly shut.

  “I’m not the only one who’s been paying attention, Sam,” I said. “Get you started and you’re like a robot with a stick up its ass with all of the organizing and planning everything. But I’m neither your job nor a combat mission, buddy.”

  “Can you put a stick up a robot’s ass? I guess it depends on the type of robot really, doesn’t it?”

  “Shut up. You know what I mean.”

  “So you don’t like Hawaii then?” he asked mildly.

  “I don’t like being managed.”

  “I see.”

  “If we’re doing this—” I said, setting my glass aside and wriggling my way off his lap. Because I would wriggle if I damn well wanted to. His arms reluctantly let me go, his gaze tense and watchful. “—and that is a definite if—then I’m in charge.”

  “You’re in charge,” he repeated rather more slowly.

  “Is that going to be a problem?”

  He paused. “Absolutely not.”

  “That’s the correct answer.”

  Serve him right if I left him hanging. Mind you, it seemed a shame to waste such a magnificent hard-on. Also, when it came to making skin to skin contact with the man, I apparently had pressing needs. Seriously urgent ones. And since physical needs were far easier than emotional to deal with, I climbed back onto his lap, straddling him this time. He immediately gripped my waist, holding me steady all protective-like. My hands meanwhile smoothed over his very lovely shoulders. A hungry gaze slid over me, making my pussy tingle. We’d barely gotten started and he had me all worked up. Without a doubt, the man had skills. Always nice to know up front that you weren’t wasting your time.

  “No more of this timeline nonsense either,” I said, sounding a bit more breathy than I would have liked.

  “You’re on top. Understood.”

  “Good.” I nodded, grinding against him. Christ. Everything low in me tightened with need, it felt so fucking amazing. Horny was far safer than attempting to deal with heart stuff. “I’m using you for sex and that’s all that’s happening between us right now.”

  His brows rose. “You’re using me for sex?”

  “Yes.”

  “Huh.”

  “Is that all you have to say?” I asked.

  “Well…always happy to be of service. Whenever y
ou’re ready.”

  Nails digging into the back of his neck just a little, I cocked my head. “Is that a dare I’m hearing, Sam?”

  “Martha, my love.” His smile, it was pure predator. “You bet it is.”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Never one to be outdone, I shoved my hand down the front of his board shorts and grabbed his cock. Hot skin and hard flesh more than filled my hand. All the while, his hooded gaze stayed glued to my face, doing his best to read me no doubt. But I was in charge. Not him. And pushing aside my bikini bottoms and sinking down on him more than demonstrated that fact.

  “M-Martha,” he stammered, fingers digging into my hips almost hard enough to bruise. His eyelids slammed shut. “Fuck.”

  The man was large. Thicker than I’d expected. Some wriggling was definitely required. I panted, gripping his neck tightly, my cheek pressed against his. Bit by bit, I took all of him inside me. An adjustment period would also be needed. Holy hell. “Just give me a moment.”

  “Give you a moment?” He shifted his hold, strong arms surrounding me. “I think you just killed me.”

  “What? Why?”

  “It didn’t occur to you to give me any warning?”

  “Me grabbing your penis didn’t signal something was about to happen?”

  His laughter came from deep inside his chest, brutally low and rough. Hands stroked firmly down my spine, soothing me. There may or may not have been an air of possession about the way he touched me. I don’t know. Other things were on my mind right then. Like figuring out how to breathe and keep my heart beating with his big dick inside of me. “Guess I should have asked about protection etcetera.”

  “That might have been wise.” More laughter. “I’m clean. Tested regularly.”

  “Yes, same, regularly. I always have, promise.”

  “I know. Wouldn’t have let you grab my dick without a lengthy discussion otherwise.”

  “Then what the hell were you complaining about just now?” I rested my chin on his shoulder, getting comfortable. For such a hard man, he was awfully comfy. “Honestly, Sam. Talk about mixed signals.”

  “Most women like a little foreplay first is all.”

  “Oh, that.”

  “We haven’t even kissed.” His mouth moved up my neck, hot and seductive. Teeth nipped and his tongue dragged over my skin, lighting up every single freaking nerve in me. “Not that I’m complaining.”

  “Do that again.”

  He obliged as I rocked my hips, rising and falling just a little. There was no rush. And testing his stamina appealed to me. Fingers tugged at the ties on my bikini top, loosening the straps. Soon I was as bare chested as him, my stiff nipples brushing against his hard pecs and smattering of chest hair. Interesting to note that sensation wise, chest hair had been much underrated. Most of the guys I’d screwed previously had shaved or waxed. But this was much nicer.

  One hand palmed a breast, the other holding the back of my neck. All the better to guide my mouth to his. It wasn’t a polite first kiss. But then, I guess we were probably well past that stage. His firm lips pressed hard against mine, slick tongue sliding into my mouth. The man kissed me with a decade’s worth of hunger and longing. I might not have known for quite that long, but I answered him just the same. We owned each other. Mouths fused and hands grasping.

  Finished with kneading my breast, he traced down to where we were joined. The pad of his thumb rubbed around my clit, tantalizing me and making everything that much more urgent.

  “That’s it,” he murmured.

  I rode him harder, taking his thick girth. With him working me, dragging things out this time wasn’t an option. Someone had obviously given the man a map to my body. Or he simply was that good. Either way, my pussy tightened on him. Everything in me drawing impossibly tight before boom! Orgasmic explosion. It was the big bang all over again. I came harder than I had possibly ever. My body shaking, every muscle trembling. All of the good hormones rushed through me, sending me sky high.

  “Christ.” Gripping my hips tight, he slammed me down on him over and over. Until finally he came too. “Martha.”

  If I hadn’t been busy biting his shoulder I might have answered. Doubtful though. My mind had been wiped clean, every part of me floating and yet weirdly heavy with lassitude. It was entirely possible I’d never come down. His body shook, pelvis grinding against me. We were plastered together, not a hairsbreadth of space between us. My arms were wrapped tight around his neck. Possibly suffocating him. But honestly, such were the risks of making a woman come that hard.

  And so easily. Damn.

  Next time I’d make him work harder for it. Try out a couple of different positions and really put him to the test. Yes, good call. Using Sam for sex might just be the best idea I’d ever had. Or possibly the worst, given how scarily addictive sex with him could become. Maybe I should take a breath before already mentally planning our next encounter.

  “What are you thinking about?” he asked, clever fingers massaging my back, rubbing my neck.

  “Nothing,” I lied. “You didn’t even think to ask if I was on contraception.”

  He shrugged. “A baby would be fine. After all, I’m not getting any younger.”

  “You did not just say that.” I sat up, aghast. It took a moment to untangle ourselves and another to find my bikini top. “A baby…fucking hell, Sam.”

  “Too much?” His smile was small but sneaky. Very sneaky. “I think you’d make a wonderful mother. Look how good you are with Gib.”

  “I’m on contraception, thank you very much.”

  “Of course you are. It was just a thought. But on the timeline it was still a year or so down the track.”

  Given how much effort I put into glaring at the man, his magnanimous expression was irritating as all hell. While he tucked himself back into his pants, I concentrated on righting my bikini. Because it would be wonderful if anyone looking out the windows saw me half naked. Absolutely wonderful. Maybe semi-public sex in my brother’s hot tub hadn’t been the best idea. Especially since it had started Sam talking about children, of all things. Though the orgasm really had been something.

  “Relax, Martha,” he said. “I’m just joking. Of course you’re not ready to discuss children yet.”

  My mouth really did gape this time. “I said I was just using you for sex.”

  “And you did.”

  “That’s all. Just sex.”

  “All right then.”

  He put his hands behind his head, all relaxed-like. Not getting distracted by the way the position made his muscles bulge was harder than it should have been. Especially given how angry he’d made me. Thank God for champagne. I grabbed another glassful, sitting safely opposite and well away from him. If ever a man seemed to delight in pressing my buttons. Though he didn’t just press them. He jabbed at those bastards for all he was worth and then sat back and clapped when I went off. Asshole. And they said age brought you wisdom. Boy were they wrong.

  “You are such a shit stirrer,” I grumbled.

  “Sorry, love.”

  “Stop calling me that,” I said. “And if you ever repeat that crap about us having children I am never fucking you ever again.”

  “That would be sad. I thought for a first time we didn’t do too badly.”

  Silence descended. Stars twinkled. I sipped my champagne and tried to re-find my post-orgasmic bliss. “You think you can do better?”

  “I know so.”

  “Hmm.”

  He waded across the tub, stopping when my outstretched hand hit his chest. “I’m not allowed to show you affection after sex?”

  “A. I like my space. B. You’ve pissed me off.”

  Instead of retreating, however, he stayed put, stroking my hand and toying with my fingers. The same ones holding him back. Such a ridiculous man, behaving as if we were suddenly a couple or something. Either that or a very determined one.

  His gaze when he looked at me was gentle, far too warm. “Like I said, I’ve b
een waiting for you for a long time. I was a little worked up. Next time will be much better, I promise.”

  Much better might kill me. Still, it was an intriguing idea. “I’ll give it some thought.”

  “You do that.”

  “I’m going up to bed now. Alone.” And while climbing over the edge of an inbuilt hot tub in a bikini might not be the most elegant exit, it was, however, certainly the most expedient. With the overly demonstrative mood Sam was in, he’d probably want to hug or something, which would be misleading for everyone involved. That wasn’t what we were. Whatever exactly we were.

  “Night, love,” he said cheerfully. Apparently undeterred.

  “Stop calling me that,” I hissed, collecting the remnants of the bottle of Cristal on my way. Be a pity to waste it and I was in need of something to calm me down.

  Behind me, he chuckled, all amused. The jerk. In a display of great maturity and grace, I ignored him and got the hell out of there. I had the worst feeling I might not in fact be winning when it came to our verbal sparring. Perhaps all of the information, emotions, and sex had boggled my brain. Tomorrow I’d have a better handle on things. A clearer perspective.

  Inside the house, Lizzy was wisely nowhere in sight. A second bottle of Cristal waited on my bedside table along with some candles for mood lighting. She probably thought she’d been setting up quite the lovenest for Sam and me. As if. I’d catch up with her later, the conniving girl.

  And I did not lie awake for hours frowning at the ceiling thinking about him. That would just be stupid. For some reason, however, sleep didn’t come. But surely it had nothing to do with him. Because whatever Sam’s original plans might have been, we were just using each for sex. Therefore, there could be no possible reason for me to be freaking out about all of his relationship talk. Sex. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just really great sex. Apparently, even better than what we’d had tonight and it had been rather fucking great. Though he might have just been bragging. Though as my brother had said, Sam wasn’t the type to say something he didn’t mean.